


Unhealthy

by orphan_account



Category: Everwood
Genre: Cutting, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-01-15
Updated: 2003-01-15
Packaged: 2017-10-14 18:41:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/152284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amy takes out her feelings about Ephram and Colin on her body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unhealthy

Ephram's face has become her inner thigh. That's where she makes the incisions, small and tidy. Tidy until the blood wells, and trickles down to her bare knee. She reaches for a tissue to stop it, leaving her skin sticky with dried redness and white lint.

Colin wanted to touch her there. This new Colin, so fragile, shaking, a ticking bomb in her arms. His fingers swollen, fumbling with the zipper of her jeans. She stopped him. This is private. This is her shame.

She thinks of her father's face, the way it would distort if he knew. She can hear his words now: "This isn't healthy, Amy."

But isn't that what he said about Colin, on the empty days when she rode the bus to Denver, when her butt fell asleep and her soul grew numb? Or when Colin came back, a shell, and she devoted everything to loving him?

Her father thinks love is unhealthy. For a doctor, he has such a narrow view. Sometimes she thinks he would tell her that life is unhealthy.

Standing before the mirror, she looks healthy. Her cheeks are pink and full, her hair long and glossy. She is hiding her pain away, packaging it into a neat box. The secret scars on her flesh are her filing cabinet. She must put her problems away, before anyone detects them. She must be strong.

Ephram isn't strong. The shadows under his eyes grow blacker. His skin is pallid, and his lips are thin stripes of sorrow. Every cut she makes, every gasp of delicious pain, is reflected on his face.

Amy's thigh, Ephram's face. She wishes she were as free as he is. She wishes she didn't have to hide her despair.


End file.
